"Age shall not weary them nor the years condemn"

This is the week of Remembrance for the “fallen” of world wars and modern conflicts from the Gulf Wars to Afghanistan. On Sunday my daughter, who is in the Sea Cadets carried the standard and lowered it in tribute at her local parade.

As my daughter makes the first big choice in her life over which A levels to take I continue living a battened down life trying to write my books supplemented with security shifts. I have been wearing a poppy on my lapel so this last week I have thought much about the real heroes commemorated by the British Legion campaign. Young men and women who never had a chance to develop into maturity and to find their way through the character shaping trials and tribulations of life.

This was brought into a personal focus last year when we visited the grave of my wife's great uncle killed at the battle of Arras in 1917. The family connection made the headstone of Private Richard Clune of the Royal Field Artillery, born in Limerick, all the more poignant.

The ranks of white tombstones in just one French cemetery bore witness to the lost generation of the first world war. Perhaps with next year's centenary there will be a time to reflect on the unfulfilled potential of those who did not return from war.

Without enforced participation in wars and conflict I have had the opportunity to live a full life and to make my my own choices leading to mistakes and fulfillment. When contemporaries of my age would have been mobilised for war I was living in Hong Kong and having a blast. Playing rugby, selling crisps and working on the door of a dodgy night club in the then British colony’s Lan Kwai Fong Bar area. I was nineteen and working on the door of a club with a supposed 21 age limit, which was all part of my adventure.

The plan had been to go travelling for a couple of months before coming back to blighty and joining the Royal Navy. In the end I stayed for nearly two years and to my partial regret never did join the Services.

For part of my time there I was living in a shared flat in Discovery Bay on Lantau island, which was about an hour away by ferry from the skyscrapers of Central. The occasion I first remember wanting to write stories, was on the top deck of the slow Disco Bay ferry passing the iconic waterfront and out into Victoria Harbour. After a long shift, rounded off with a couple of beers, I caught the early morning ferry and passed the mighty aircraft carrier (I think it was the USS Midway) surrounded by buzzing military craft and escorts. It set me thinking and sowed the seeds of looking to writing as a future career .

The Midway and the rest of the fleet were in town on the way to the first Gulf War and there were ten thousand American sailors and Marines out on R&R. Lan Kwai Fong and my club was mad busy. Uniformed American Military Police with their snowdrop helmets and long nightstick batons were patrolling the streets.

Saddam Hussein’s forces had just invaded Kuwait and the American Pacific Fleet were going to give him a bloody nose. As far as the US Marines were concerned this was going to be their D-Day and some of them did not expect to live. They partied like there was no tomorrow and spent their money on having what could be their last good time. We had little trouble that weekend and in the end the Iraqis were easily defeated but I remember that experience and my immersion in what felt like a scene out of a Vietnam war movie.

After all this excitement the fictional character that developed in my head in 1990 was a young Royal Marine stationed in Hong Kong on anti smuggling patrol and his adventures dealing with Triads and loose women. My book would capture the sights, smells and atmosphere of what was to me the most exciting city in the world as much as explore the details of his career in the military. 

Apart from a few scribbled notes I was too busy living life to write all the story down but the idea stayed in my head. My life progressed at a fast pace and I returned to Liverpool, joined a business, bought a house, married and started a family. As time went by my thoughts kept returning to my Royal Marine character called ‘Dan Richards’ and every so often I sat down to write the first chapter of my book.

My first effort was about Dan on his fast pursuit craft chasing smugglers. Then a couple of years later another first chapter was based on an ex serviceman who was starting an import export business called ‘Richards Agencies’.

The writing urge never coincided with having the time and when I did have the opportunity to take time out to write in 2007 I ran headlong into running a hotel business. After a few months it became obvious that I was not a natural hotelier and should have stopped a bit longer to explore writing as a job option with money in my pocket.

In an effort to make sense of my rather daft lifestyle choice I started making notes for a book about the lessons learned in the hotel. When I escaped chastened and lighter in the pocket I continued to write that book. When I had poured my heart and soul into those pages I put the 120k word manuscript to one side.
Only then did I finally sit down to write a novel with my hero being an ex Royal Marine called Dan Richards.

I went back to my writing roots and the first section started off in Hong Kong and was meant to show Dan as a carefree young man. The rest of the story was an exploration of where that young man had ended up 20 years later, a battle hardened veteran of modern warfare with the mental and physical scars to prove it.

When I had finished writing the whole story it struck me that the first section was not hugely relevant to the rest of the plot and so in a dramatic gesture I cut it out, all twenty thousand words of it.

The manuscript went to my editor and after further rewrites I published my first novel,
    

Then thoroughly enjoying myself I embarked on writing Book 2 of Dan’s adventures, ‘Personal Space’. However that first Hong Kong section of Book 1 that I had surgically removed was still stored on my computer and its ghost was calling to me.

As an independent author I have to consider the sales and marketing aspects of my writing life. So I thought I would add some content to my portfolio by publishing the Hong Kong story as a prequel novella calling it ‘Dragon’. I took my eye off the ball with Book 2 and diverted my time to polishing up the old story that had been rattling around my head for so long.  

I thought it would be a quick easy win to boost content on my author platform. That is until I sent it to my editor. Editors take their time and although I knew there would be a certain amount of rewriting I was keen to press ahead and carry on with Book 2.  So while the edit was away I had fun sorting out my cover for Dragon.

Then reality struck, my editor liked the story but knowing the history pointed out that it was obviously an early work and on top of the rewrites, the story would be better developed into a full novel to cover the plot twists that I had chopped off to keep it brief. I wanted to move on quickly so it was hard advice to take.

When I contacted an experienced writer friend for advice she told me about William Faulkener’s phrase that “in writing you must kill your darlings.” That made sense and I have put the young Dan back in his box until I have time to relive his adventures again.  

The truth is that when I invented the twenty year old Dan he was my contemporary inhabiting a part of my life that I was experiencing at that time. Now my contemporary is the grizzled and damaged ex-sergeant that Dan was to become. I find I have more interest in the current Dan with all his problems rather than the callow youth he once was.  

As a writer my own story is deeper now and enriched with my own experiences. I have freedom and vitality to be creative and to write my own thoughts and when needed to make the choice to kill off my 'literary darlings'. But on this week of remembrance for the fallen and survivors of world war and modern conflicts I bear in mind those who have never had that chance. 

JRS 

www.jrsheridan.com